Life Coach - Be Your Own-10

Managing Anger

Focus on an area in your body that is giving you pain or any other sensation.

Sit quietly; allow your attention to focus on your body. Are there any specific areas in your body that seem to have more sensation than others?

Pay attention to these areas of sensation one by one. Now that you are focusing on a specific area identify the shape of the sensation. What color is it? What shape is it? Does it make a sound?

Now that you have all this information, change the color to a color you are more comfortable with, change the shape what feels comfortable and change the sound to a sound that is soothing to you. Ok! Now check if the sensation has changed if you would like to change it some more, redo this process.

You are probably looking at this process and thinking Irene you have lost it, it is not possible that something this simple can make the pain I am feeling go away. That is the first thing you will have to change. Everything in life depends on attitude and this includes our health.

The past winter was difficult for me. I am a summer baby, is what I tell people, in winter I would make a good bear, hibernation really appeals to me. This last winter I made up me mind not to get ‘flu, it is a belief that I should feel bad about life and myself in winter. What did I do, I started in summer and got a fitness programmed going, this includes eating properly, exercising and going for a treatment every second week.

 Anger process

You should never take anger out on another person.

Some people respond very well to physical exercise to get rid of anger.

Go jogging or go to gym, do something just get it out of your system. Get it out!

 Process one:

With the first anger process you need a buddy, someone you can trust to support you.

You also need to do some preparation.

Tightly roll up a newspaper and wind wide tape around the entire roll so that it looks like a batten.

Find a hand towel to wipe your face, neck and hands.

Prepare a bowl of warm water with a clean cloth in it.

Find a blanket to cover yourself after the process.

Make sure there is nothing in the room you can break or that can hurt you.

Wear comfortable clothing.

Now that you are prepared, ask your buddy to sit away from you.

Take the newspaper batten in your hand and start beating the floor. Do this until you have no more energy left.

During this process it is okay to say whatever comes into your mind. When you have completed the process, your buddy will assist you to lie down on your back to relax. At this point your buddy will wipe your face, neck and hands with the cloth that was submerged in the water.

Your buddy will cover you with the blanket.

 Process two:

Take an old thick telephone directory or anything you can tear up and start tearing it up.

It’s best to tear it into pieces as small as you possibly can.

After the process, lie down on the floor and relax.

 Process three:

A punch bag: You can use a boxer’s punch bag or you can use a cushion as a punch bag. Punch it until you have no more energy left. Then lie down and relax. Drink some water to re-hydrate your body.

 Process four:

Releasing anger in positive ways.

Speak to the person you are angry with. Say I am angry at you because__________

Speak to the person in the mirror; find a safe place that you will not be disturbed. Show all the anger you feel. Get all your feelings out. You may let your anger out physically. This you can do by punching a pillow. Forgive the person or persons you do this for yourself.

 Forgiveness process

Keep in mind that you only need to forgive someone if you expected something from him or her and this did not occur.

 Process one

This is a very effective and powerful process.

It works best with an imaginary.

Sit or lie down comfortably; then you breath slowly and deeply to relax.

Visualize yourself sitting in a chair and around you is everybody that you need to forgive.

Once everybody is sitting around you, look into the eyes of the person who is sitting in front of you and say, “I forgive you”.

You don’t need to get a response from the person.

Look the next person in the eyes and say, “I forgive you”.

While you are absorbed in this process, also try to see the dignity in the other person’s eyes.

If you can see the true worth of the other person, it makes the forgiveness so much easier.

You do not have to say what you forgive the person for that is not important.

What’s important is that you forgive them.

If you feel you need to release the psychic connection or the energy connection, what you need to do then, is visualized a cord between you and that person, and then the cord being removed from your chakra.

You can’t just pull it out of you because you will damage your energy system. You need to gently remove the psychic cord and visualize your chakra working properly without it.

Just give your chakra a bit of extra energy, to heal it.

When you come to the last person, don’t stop – you haven’t forgiven the most important person yet.

Imagine a mirror in the last chair.

Look into your own eyes.

This could be the most difficult of all for you.

Look at yourself in the mirror say, “I forgive you”.

Now that you have forgiven everybody, including yourself, perhaps what’s required here, is you need to forgive the Universe.

Still sitting in your chair relaxing now say, “Universe I forgive you.” This is one way of doing the forgiveness process; it is quite a potent way.

 Process two

Another forgiveness process is, to write a list in the following way:

Name of person, I forgive you.

And I forgive myself and

Universe I forgive you.

Now that you have completed your list, get yourself into a meditative state and read through the list.

Once you have read through the list, let it go!

Light the piece of paper and let it burn …

Process three

Make a list of the following:

Who have I loved?

Who have I not loved?

Who have I forgiven?

Who have I not forgiven?

When you forgive & let go, not only does a huge weight drop off your shoulders, but the doorway to your own self-love opens.

I forgive everyone who has ever been in my life.

I forgive everyone who is in my life now.

I forgive everyone who will be in my life in the future.

I forgive all of them totally.

I forgive the world totally.

I forgive my parents totally.

I forgive myself totally.

I forgive God totally.

Jack did not think he needed to do anything he is just fine. “I have been angry for many years and I didn’t do anything about it because I felt like I was the one being angry at people making my life a misery. Until I went to a talk and the person was saying that everything that happens to me is my doing and I should forgive the people. I was so angry I could not even argue, as I wanted to, after the talk I had calmed down somewhat and I went up to the speaker to tell her exactly what I thought. She calmly explained to me how it works and how she sees it working for me. I did the anger process and felt much better afterwards. I was not done just yet as I still had a forgiveness process to do. The strange thing is I found this more difficult. I did the Reflection in which you see the people in the chairs around you. After these two processes I felt so much better I wondered why I did not do them years ago. I was not ready years ago.”

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